Separation Anxiety in Pre-schoolers.
First days are filled with excitement, happiness, eagerness and also anxiety. It is quite common for a child to feel overwhelmed at the prospect of a new environment, teacher or setting.
Feeling separation anxiety is a developmental area which children first start to feel at around one year of age. It can often resurface when they start at childcare, preschool, kindergarten, primary school and into their high school experiences. Some kids even seem to be doing fine with their transition only to experience separation anxiety a few weeks into the school year.
Crying, clinginess and school refusal are all common with a child who is experiencing separation anxiety. Occasionally we also see a of regression of behaviour. For example, a toilet trained child may suddenly fail to make it to the bathroom on time. When a child is challenged by a new developmental task, they are likely to temporarily lose ground in an area already mastered.
The following are some tips that might help:
- Stick to a routine. Children are at their best when they have plenty of rest, eat a nutritious breakfast and don’t feel rushed. Prepack lunches and snacks the night before to save time in the morning.
- When you first arrive at school, remind your child about their daily routine jobs, record book away bag into locker and wash hands. Then assist them to settle to a favourite activity such as play dough or block play. Engage with them for a few minutes.
- Saying Goodbye: Be honest with your child and tell them that it is time for you to leave. Let them know that you will be back. Even though there may be a few tears, often when parents are out of sight children will settle happily into activities and the tears will ease.
- Its best to not drag out the goodbye as this often increases the separation anxiety.
- Be positive and happy yourself. Children can sometimes sense when their parents are upset or worried and this might lead to an increase in their anxiety.
- Be gentle on yourself, this is a big step for all parents and children. If parents hesitate, kids will pick up on their emotions and could feel unsafe. Plan a coffee date with a friend or your spouse immediately following drop off so that you have support.
Here are some stories that you might like to share with your child around separation anxiety:
The Kissing Hand by Audrey Penn.
Llama Llama Misses Mama by Anna Dewdney.
Feel free to call the school anytime to check on your child’s progress. Our staff will also call you should your child continue to be really upset and not able to settle.
All the staff at Tintern are committed to ensuring that your child has happy experiences at school.
